Yesterday I did a fabulous workout that killed my hammys and my quads, but I feel great. I love the burn after a good workout, and how it often lasts into the next two days.
I have been trying to eat healthier, but one of my vices is the sweet things. My ND suggested that I just cut them out of my diet, 'cold turkey'. She said that because I'm so addicted to sweets, it's harder to stop indulging if I give in for even one day. This is going to be very hard for me. I will eventually be able to have them again, but yesterday I kept dreaming of chocolate mousse and how wonderful it would taste.
For my workouts, I watch some exercise videos online, and I hear the trainer's mantras in my head all the time: 'Keep your food clean!' 'Keep pushin'' 'Think before you eat something'
I've also been praying. Yesterday was a perfect example. I was looking after my young charge in the afternoon, when all of a sudden he says, "Let's bake cookies!" My eyes rolled up to the heavens and I said to God, "Oh, Lord, you are going to have to help me with this one!" I plopped dough on the pan, put it in the oven, transferred to cooling racks, all while everything in me was aching to just have one. I prayed again. "God give me strength..." And He did! I didn't have even one cookie. It was super hard, but I'm not alone. God is so good.
Love,
Ashleigh
1.13.2012
1.12.2012
Community...
Every month there is a community dinner at my church. Jake and I have been helping out with the cleanup, which means we get there early to enjoy the meal first. Last night they were serving lasagna with caesar salad. Everyone was salivating over this lasagna, and, unfortunately, there is no recipe, since the church ladies made it off the top of their combined heads.
I love coming out and helping, and I especially love eating the food. What bothers me is how little I actually talk to the people from the community. Some of them don't have much, and come from hard backgrounds. I sometimes feel like an imposter. I belong to that church, go there every week, but I have such difficulty engaging them in polite conversation, let alone sharing about Jesus. Many of them intimidate me, if I'm going to be honest. Big biker guys with tattoos all over them, hardened single moms- I have absolutely NO idea how to start a conversation.
However, I'm grateful to have these opportunities, and pray that God will use me even when I feel inadequate.
Love,
Ashleigh
I love coming out and helping, and I especially love eating the food. What bothers me is how little I actually talk to the people from the community. Some of them don't have much, and come from hard backgrounds. I sometimes feel like an imposter. I belong to that church, go there every week, but I have such difficulty engaging them in polite conversation, let alone sharing about Jesus. Many of them intimidate me, if I'm going to be honest. Big biker guys with tattoos all over them, hardened single moms- I have absolutely NO idea how to start a conversation.
However, I'm grateful to have these opportunities, and pray that God will use me even when I feel inadequate.
Love,
Ashleigh
1.11.2012
Roles defined...
Have you ever noticed that each member of the family has a different role to play? This isn't a serious social sciences discussion here, but I have some examples.
When I was growing up, it was just understood that Dad makes the coffee. Before any of us children really drank any, it was just mom and dad knocking back the java. I remember days where mom would go without coffee because dad wasn't home to make it. Jake and I were sitting around the table with my family on Saturday night when someone mentioned coffee. Mom and Dad aren't the only ones drinking it anymore. They trained their three girls well (for some reason our brothers just aren't into it!) Ten minutes later, Vanessa, my sister, impatiently shouted out, "Dad! You have to make the coffee now!" and that's just how it's done. Dad makes the coffee (with some friendly nudging on the side), and what good coffee it is!
My brother Graham, on the other hand, is quite adept at making a nice bowl of perfectly salted and buttered popcorn. When movie time came around, who do you think got asked to pop some kernels for us?
If someone wanted any sort of treat bought for them (i.e. candy, Iced caps, donuts, you name it), they would ask Melissa. She was the 'sugar mama', and I think Karl and Vanessa still take advantage of her generosity.
Vanessa was the dynamo, the activist (and still is...see the coffee example!). If anyone wants something to get done, quickly, ask her. She does the job, and in lightning speed. (No wonder she's got the best marks in school out of all of us!)
Mom is just good at everything, much to her chagrin. I think most moms are, though. But I've never met a mom who could provide you with a last-minute gift (from a stash at home), including the gift bag AND card for any occasion. My mom can do that. AND how! It's incredible!
Karl is still too young (and came at the end of the line) for us to know his role yet, and I simply can't remember mine. Oh, selective memory, you have failed me yet again!
Roles like these are, in some ways, tongue-in-cheek, and borne from familial habit and consistency rather than a societal definition of who does what.
This morning I was reading in the news that a conference taking place in Israel is allowing only men to be keynote speakers. This wouldn't be so bad, except for the fact that the topic is gynecological advance, which is a matter that concerns women. The article said that there are many professional women who could speak on the topic, but they are only allowed to sit in the audience.
In North America, we have taken women's rights for granted. I do not claim to be fully knowledgeable about matters that take place in other countries, but from what I hear and read about in the news, there are still women who don't have a say, even in things that directly pertain to them.
It is unfortunate that some roles are still being defined, but encouraging to hear that people are pushing back and questioning tradition.
What are your thoughts?
Love,
Ashleigh
When I was growing up, it was just understood that Dad makes the coffee. Before any of us children really drank any, it was just mom and dad knocking back the java. I remember days where mom would go without coffee because dad wasn't home to make it. Jake and I were sitting around the table with my family on Saturday night when someone mentioned coffee. Mom and Dad aren't the only ones drinking it anymore. They trained their three girls well (for some reason our brothers just aren't into it!) Ten minutes later, Vanessa, my sister, impatiently shouted out, "Dad! You have to make the coffee now!" and that's just how it's done. Dad makes the coffee (with some friendly nudging on the side), and what good coffee it is!
My brother Graham, on the other hand, is quite adept at making a nice bowl of perfectly salted and buttered popcorn. When movie time came around, who do you think got asked to pop some kernels for us?
If someone wanted any sort of treat bought for them (i.e. candy, Iced caps, donuts, you name it), they would ask Melissa. She was the 'sugar mama', and I think Karl and Vanessa still take advantage of her generosity.
Vanessa was the dynamo, the activist (and still is...see the coffee example!). If anyone wants something to get done, quickly, ask her. She does the job, and in lightning speed. (No wonder she's got the best marks in school out of all of us!)
Mom is just good at everything, much to her chagrin. I think most moms are, though. But I've never met a mom who could provide you with a last-minute gift (from a stash at home), including the gift bag AND card for any occasion. My mom can do that. AND how! It's incredible!
Karl is still too young (and came at the end of the line) for us to know his role yet, and I simply can't remember mine. Oh, selective memory, you have failed me yet again!
Roles like these are, in some ways, tongue-in-cheek, and borne from familial habit and consistency rather than a societal definition of who does what.
This morning I was reading in the news that a conference taking place in Israel is allowing only men to be keynote speakers. This wouldn't be so bad, except for the fact that the topic is gynecological advance, which is a matter that concerns women. The article said that there are many professional women who could speak on the topic, but they are only allowed to sit in the audience.
In North America, we have taken women's rights for granted. I do not claim to be fully knowledgeable about matters that take place in other countries, but from what I hear and read about in the news, there are still women who don't have a say, even in things that directly pertain to them.
It is unfortunate that some roles are still being defined, but encouraging to hear that people are pushing back and questioning tradition.
What are your thoughts?
Love,
Ashleigh
1.10.2012
Back in the Game...
I'm happy to say that I'm going back to work today. After a month off, I'm done with cabin fever and not getting anything accomplished. This is it, I'm doing it, getting back in the game, and feeling accomplished.
I'm also looking forward to the social interaction I get from working in a college cafeteria. It's wonderful to see so many smiling faces every day, and it really does give me a positive boost. I'm so thankful for my job there.
Speaking of food, it's been fun trying to see how low we can keep our grocery bill while still buying food that is healthy. Yesterday, it was only $56 for the week, and that included a TON of veggies, an $11 package of frozen chicken, and some dairy stuff- you know how expensive that can get. It was really nice to see so many vegetables on the conveyor belt, and I had a hard time not comparing our foodstuffs to the woman's beside us, which amounted to over $100 and consisted of a lot of junk (truth be told, I think she was buying it for her daughter who was just starting university).
Both Jake and I have a hard time feeling full after eating vegetables. In my case, I always feel the need to eat something hearty, like bread, rice, or pasta with a meal.
Case in point:
Last night I made a roast pork loin with squash and peas. Were we full afterwards? No.
What we chose to eat as a filler, I am ashamed to say, was not healthy in the least. Some gummi bears and a bowl of peanuts, marshmallows, and chocolate chips were our vices. I think bread or rice would have been a better option by that point.
As much as I know about health and nutrition, these are the times that I cry out, "What was I thinking?!" It seems as if I still have a long way to go to break the habits that I've taken 20 years to form (including needing something sweet after a meal).
I just pray that God would continue to keep me on the healthy path of nutrition, and that He will help me to form better habits that will stick with me for life.
Because we all know that eating healthy and exercise should not just be something you add and take out of your life at will.
They must become part of your lifestyle.
Here's to a happy and healthy 2012.
Love,
Ashleigh
I'm also looking forward to the social interaction I get from working in a college cafeteria. It's wonderful to see so many smiling faces every day, and it really does give me a positive boost. I'm so thankful for my job there.
Speaking of food, it's been fun trying to see how low we can keep our grocery bill while still buying food that is healthy. Yesterday, it was only $56 for the week, and that included a TON of veggies, an $11 package of frozen chicken, and some dairy stuff- you know how expensive that can get. It was really nice to see so many vegetables on the conveyor belt, and I had a hard time not comparing our foodstuffs to the woman's beside us, which amounted to over $100 and consisted of a lot of junk (truth be told, I think she was buying it for her daughter who was just starting university).
Both Jake and I have a hard time feeling full after eating vegetables. In my case, I always feel the need to eat something hearty, like bread, rice, or pasta with a meal.
Case in point:
Last night I made a roast pork loin with squash and peas. Were we full afterwards? No.
What we chose to eat as a filler, I am ashamed to say, was not healthy in the least. Some gummi bears and a bowl of peanuts, marshmallows, and chocolate chips were our vices. I think bread or rice would have been a better option by that point.
As much as I know about health and nutrition, these are the times that I cry out, "What was I thinking?!" It seems as if I still have a long way to go to break the habits that I've taken 20 years to form (including needing something sweet after a meal).
I just pray that God would continue to keep me on the healthy path of nutrition, and that He will help me to form better habits that will stick with me for life.
Because we all know that eating healthy and exercise should not just be something you add and take out of your life at will.
They must become part of your lifestyle.
Here's to a happy and healthy 2012.
Love,
Ashleigh
1.09.2012
Good reads...
Some of you have been asking me to recommend some good books to read, so here are some that I have enjoyed over the past year or two:
Wuthering Heights, by Emily Bronte- If you want to step your Old-English skills up a notch, this book is perfect. It can be a bit dry, but I personally liked the intrigue and mystery of it. Heathcliff and Kathy forever!
Secret Daughter, by Shilpi Somaya Gowda- A secular best-seller in 2009, this book is an adoption story that will break your heart, but it's a very good read none-the-less.
Warrior Princess, by Princess Kasune Zulu- An autobiography written by an HIV-AIDS positive woman from Africa, this book will touch your heart and give you understanding of the reality of AIDS.
Immanuel's Veins, by Ted Dekker- We all know that Ted Dekker is not for the faint of heart, and this book is probably one of the most disturbing but intriguing books that I've read. Think Twilight meets Christian values and you'll be right on track. I liked the Christian symbolism, as well as how "out-of-the-box" Dekker wrote for this one.That's all for now. I tried to include a few different genres, since not everyone has the same taste. Let me know if you read any of them, and what you think.
Happy reading!
Love,
Ashleigh
p.s. Jake and I had a reading contest last year. Guess what happened? We tied! We both read 38 books this year (although, he concedes that I read more pages than him, since most of his books were short). However, I am determined to read more than him in 2012. Bring it on!
For the Love of...
Sometimes I go to Psalm 119 when I need a reminder of why it's good to love God's Word. Here's a part that stood out to me today:
Psalm 119:81-88
Kaph
81 My soul longs for your salvation;
I hope in your word.
82 My eyes long for your promise;
I ask, “When will you comfort me?”
83 For I have become like a wineskin in the smoke,
yet I have not forgotten your statutes.
84 How long must your servant endure?[a]
When will you judge those who persecute me?
85 The insolent have dug pitfalls for me;
they do not live according to your law.
86 All your commandments are sure;
they persecute me with falsehood; help me!
87 They have almost made an end of me on earth,
but I have not forsaken your precepts.
88 In your steadfast love give me life,
that I may keep the testimonies of your mouth.
I hope in your word.
82 My eyes long for your promise;
I ask, “When will you comfort me?”
83 For I have become like a wineskin in the smoke,
yet I have not forgotten your statutes.
84 How long must your servant endure?[a]
When will you judge those who persecute me?
85 The insolent have dug pitfalls for me;
they do not live according to your law.
86 All your commandments are sure;
they persecute me with falsehood; help me!
87 They have almost made an end of me on earth,
but I have not forsaken your precepts.
88 In your steadfast love give me life,
that I may keep the testimonies of your mouth.
The psalmist gives us three examples of troubles that he encounters:
a.) needing salvation
b.) needing comfort
c.) being tormented by enemies
With each example, he turns to God's word for help and strength
a.) I hope in your word
b.) I have not forgotten your statutes
c.) I have not forsaken your precepts (God's commands or laws)
When I feel troubled or downcast, I often don't turn to God's Word to comfort me, and I forget to call out to my God who created me. Here is my checklist, straight out of the Psalms:
Needing salvation? Hope in God's Word
Needing comfort? Remember God's Statutes
Being tormented by enemies (seen or unseen)? Cling to God's precepts
Love,
Ashleigh
1.07.2012
Winterscapes...
The tri-cities are not nearly as snow-filled as is my home-town. Jake and I visited my family this week-end, and we had a wonderful time hiking in the woods with the baby and the dog. Unfortunately mom and Graham couldn't come, but Mel, Nate, Vanessa, Karl, Dad, Jake and I (and even sleepy baby Oliver in his wee little covered sled) were all eager to get out and breathe in the fresh air. As Jake put it, God had the weather on 'random shuffle'...first it was mild and gray, then dark and hailing, then sunny and blue skies, all in the span of two hours. I was happy to get some exercise, after being stuffed to the gills with a delicious turkey dinner last night, and waffles and bacon for breakfast. My younger brother, Karl, was eager to go tobogganing, and sister Vanessa wanted to go for a walk. It was a happy medium, as the trails in the woods abounded with hills and valleys. We hiked and tobogganed our way through, and thankfully no one sprained their ankle as we slipped and slid down slush-covered terrains.
Later, as I sipped Coffee Crisp hot chocolate and listened to my mom and sister talking in the kitchen, I felt content to be there with everyone, immersed in the craziness that makes up an expanding family of seven. I'm so grateful for my family and the love that we have for one another, despite the hardships that we have endured in the past few years. Every time I hear Jake talking with my Dad, or overhear the ever-enthralling history conversations he has with my brother, or see him laughing with my youngest brother as they come up with schemes to get me riled up, I thank God. It's hard to get close when we live so far away, but somehow the relationships get better and better by His grace. Week-ends like this help, and we're looking forward to spending more time with them in February.
I'm going to bed tonight with a warm feeling in my heart.
Love,
Ashleigh
Later, as I sipped Coffee Crisp hot chocolate and listened to my mom and sister talking in the kitchen, I felt content to be there with everyone, immersed in the craziness that makes up an expanding family of seven. I'm so grateful for my family and the love that we have for one another, despite the hardships that we have endured in the past few years. Every time I hear Jake talking with my Dad, or overhear the ever-enthralling history conversations he has with my brother, or see him laughing with my youngest brother as they come up with schemes to get me riled up, I thank God. It's hard to get close when we live so far away, but somehow the relationships get better and better by His grace. Week-ends like this help, and we're looking forward to spending more time with them in February.
I'm going to bed tonight with a warm feeling in my heart.
Love,
Ashleigh
1.06.2012
Prep for the Day...
How do you start your morning? Do you put on the coffee maker, stumble into the bathroom for an obligatory shower, then guzzle your cup of java like it's your lifeline? Or do you get out of bed with the sun, and don some workout clothes to go for a winter run?
More often than not, my morning routine includes a beeline for my laptop. I stumble out of bed, grab a glass of water, then head online to see what's new. If I'm not careful, I can easily spend the first two hours of my morning on the net, even before I eat breakfast.
I think it's time to set parameters for myself. I have been feeling almost physically ill by spending so much time in front of this screen. It's time to take back the morning, to fill it with purpose, and get prepped for the day in clarity.
I'm always grateful when God shows me areas in my life that I can change; even small modifications are better than nothing.
Love,
Ashleigh
1.05.2012
Finishing a Trilogy...
I had a rather sleepless night, and woke up groggy and disoriented. The morning has been slow and unproductive; yet I did finish the Millennium trilogy by Steig Larsson.
You might recall the first book in the trilogy, since The Girl With A Dragon Tattoo has been circulating and talked about for quite a while now. In fact, the English version of the movie just came to theatre at the end of December (there has been a Swedish version since 2009). While I would not necessarily recommend any of my friends to read them (Larsson deals with heavy subject matter), they were a gripping trilogy that I couldn't seem to put down. The unfortunate parts were wading through the swearing and some graphic violence, and, since I am unfamiliar with police and political jargon, the books were tough going. I was impressed, nonetheless, by Larsson's ability to embellish the characters with incredible description and back story. Characters introduced even in the third book were developed down to the very last detail.
Unfortunately, Larsson died before he could even see his books turn into bestsellers-or movies for that matter. I wonder where his creative mind would have taken him, after creating the character Lisbeth Salander, whose tattoos, slight frame, intelligent mind, photographic memory, hacker skills, hostile sociality, and inexorable hatred of violent and abusive men have taken the literary world by storm.
What are you reading these days?
Love,
Ashleigh
You might recall the first book in the trilogy, since The Girl With A Dragon Tattoo has been circulating and talked about for quite a while now. In fact, the English version of the movie just came to theatre at the end of December (there has been a Swedish version since 2009). While I would not necessarily recommend any of my friends to read them (Larsson deals with heavy subject matter), they were a gripping trilogy that I couldn't seem to put down. The unfortunate parts were wading through the swearing and some graphic violence, and, since I am unfamiliar with police and political jargon, the books were tough going. I was impressed, nonetheless, by Larsson's ability to embellish the characters with incredible description and back story. Characters introduced even in the third book were developed down to the very last detail.
Unfortunately, Larsson died before he could even see his books turn into bestsellers-or movies for that matter. I wonder where his creative mind would have taken him, after creating the character Lisbeth Salander, whose tattoos, slight frame, intelligent mind, photographic memory, hacker skills, hostile sociality, and inexorable hatred of violent and abusive men have taken the literary world by storm.
What are you reading these days?
Love,
Ashleigh
1.04.2012
Happy New Year...
It seems that I have a problem with reading other people's blogs instead of writing my own. I often find myself getting frustrated when some of my favourite bloggers haven't written for a while. Then I remember that some people may be really looking forward to my blogs, and I'm making some of you disappointed while you wait for me to write. So, for that, I apologize for not being more diligent and posting more regularly.
I hope everyone has been having a great week in this new year. The past two week-ends have been filled with driving and visiting and eating...and more eating. It was a great holiday season, and Jake had a decent amount of time off as well.
I will write more tomorrow...just wanted to check in :)
Love,
Ashleigh
I hope everyone has been having a great week in this new year. The past two week-ends have been filled with driving and visiting and eating...and more eating. It was a great holiday season, and Jake had a decent amount of time off as well.
I will write more tomorrow...just wanted to check in :)
Love,
Ashleigh
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